Raise your hand if you have ever felt as lost as a kid in Walmart during that beginning phase of separation with your twin flame?
We have all been there, done that, and bought the commemorable t-shirt!
If I had a dollar for every time I have been through collapsing timelines and separation cycles with my twin flame, I would be able to buy the t-shirt factory and mark those shirts up by 50%!
What I am eluding to is that I have nailed this whole separation cycle thing down to a science!
It doesn't have to completely suck...
You can totally survive it...
And you can level the fuck up in the process!
I am a firm believer in standing in your power and being the master of your emotions, especially in these scenarios. Nothing feels quite like wondering if "the other side" of this equation is even flinching at the thought of not being in physical contact with you!
If you're like me, you have spent the better half of this twin flame journey in bed, crying, or cursing their names. Every time you tried to forget them - BOOM! - a car passes by with their name on the side!
It feels like every chance to escape brings you right back to the beginning. You feel like you are in the most challenging labyrinth in the world, and there's no escaping the truth of your soul mission and this connection!
How do we navigate hell without getting too scorched?
What is the best way to maximize the healing from this experience?
Why does this shit keep looping back around to be looked at?
Who signed you up for this rollercoaster ride?!!
First off, our souls signed their etheric signature on the dotted line of the twin flame mission codes and the patterns or programming that continues to (re)cycle back around is showing up again because your soul wants to release old energetic bindings and agreements.
Secondly, you can navigate hell without getting too scorched, make it out alive, and live to tell the great tale of how much you leveled up after a deeply-painful separation phase with your beloved!
So, how do you do it? How do you maximize the healing potential of a separation cycle with your twin flame, (without losing your cool, your mind, or your dignity)?
Step One, ten out of ten times, is to focus on you during this time.
I know, you always hear this - and you are probably sick of hearing it. But it is essential and beneficial to completely eradicate your energy and the closeness to the physical situation.
There are so many illusions that surround the times when we are dealing with the push-pull of these connections in the physical! What we think we see versus what the cosmic truth is of the situation can differ heavily and leave us feeling defeated, triggered, left out, and forgotten.
It can become so easy to entrench ourselves in the trauma drama of the wounded inner children and Egos who are poking and prodding one another's core wounds. The very aspects that have magnetized us together (i.e. the core wound resonance) become the very things that leave us feeling burned.
Burned by the fires that ignite us!
Granted, the magnetism towards one another spans farther than just core wound resonance - but it is a big thing that serves as a common ground between twins. Show me your scars, and I will show you mine.
Pulling back your energy will give you the time and space to cycle through the emotions and energetic processing that needs to be moved through. When we spend our time trying to gain answers from the other person, we forget to ask ourselves the important questions and to gain the answers from our internal selves.
No matter how bad you want to reach out and emote to them, give it a moment and give yourself the time and space to process through and regain your sense of self. There will be a time and place to talk - but it's more beneficial to do it from a grounded and centered space.
Step Two, Inner Child and Trauma Healing are essential keys to breaking the chains from subconscious shackles.
Maybe it's because I use Quantum Inner Child Healing in my practice, or maybe it's because my whole life has shifted since I have been working with my inner child - but there is immense power to be gained when you do soul retrieval practices.
The cycles and scenarios we play out now are heavily tied to and influenced by past experiences where our power and sovereignty were stripped from us.
When you were a child and a situation occurred where you felt rejected, abandoned, betrayed, separated, or humiliated - there was nothing you could do in the situation to stand in your power...you were just a child.
Many core wounds are rooted in our psyche before the age of 8 - a time in which we had yet to form our Ego and we were merely sponges for the beliefs, practices, programming, and ideologies of those around us.
We learned to love from some of the most wounded people and places sometimes. This is not to say that anyone did this on purpose because we only know as much as we know. Our parent's "love-tools" were heirlooms passed down from their parents and their parent's parents. If no one thought to disengage from misaligned patterning, those tools were passed forward through the generations.
This, my dear twin flame, is your chance to break the chains with old heirlooms that were passed down to you. You get the opportunity to review your subconscious patterning and agreements to see if you truly agree with what has been imprinted onto you.
Even if you are not a twin flame, the spiritual ascension process is our opportunity to break free from limitations around the experience of love. We get to re-write the story and the patterns we continue to participate in.
Take the time to examine your wounds - from childhood, traumatic experiences as an adult, past-life, etc etc. Where does this pain stem from? Why are you struggling right now - especially in this love connection? What does your inner child need more than anything right now? What is your inner child trying to get from this other person right now?
Step Three, Figure out what you need and take appropriate action on those things
I did this stellar activity in conjunction with quantum inner child healing the other day that was EPIC!
I have been processing through some heavy energies as old timelines are burning away between my twin flame and myself. It has been intense, to say the least! But I have not felt sad - just pissed off, a woman scorned!
I have felt aggravated and unsure of how to move through this energy. I am an expert at navigating through rejection and abandonment and the sadness that ensues with that. But this experience has been completely different. This separation has brought out this angry pre-teen energy. Because of this, my inner child needed more than a hug and comfort - my inner child needed to resolve this situation by speaking up and processing in a more advanced manner.
See, the inner child wounds from an earlier age require a little bit of a different process of processing than the older inner child.
So, I journaled. I wrote down how I have been feeling until the truth of how I have been feeling came up (not scared...angry!). I wrote about what I can and cannot control in this situation (reinstated what I have power over). Then I wrote down a list of what I needed at this moment...
- Boundaries, so I feel safe.
- To Express Myself, so I feel heard and seen.
- To Communicate My Needs, so I feel seen and heard.
- To Have Set Agreements, so I feel empowered.
- To "Clean Up" the Situation, so I feel respected and loved.
I jotted down what kind of boundaries I needed in this situation, and I wrote down what I needed. But what helped greatly was writing down "I feel..." statements to fully understand where this trigger was coming from.
Come to find out, these feelings of my trust being broken and feeling manipulated spur from the core wound of betrayal. This is why I felt so angry! I was defending my inner child and I was ready to push back anyone who wanted to hurt my inner child.
Not only did this help me locate what timeline I needed to retrieve my soul fragment from, but I had compiled a list of things I needed so I could review what actions I needed to take to ensure I was heard and I what boundaries would help me to feel safe and empowered.
Step Four, Channel your energy into your soul mission or what you love
What to do with all this extra time, energy, and focus you've got right now?
It can be easy to travel down Anxiety Lane, at the intersection of Overthinking Avenue and Sleepless Nights Street, but who wants to live in the heaviness of that energy?!
I get it, trust me! I love to think and process and ponder, but it can become a form of self-sabotage if we continue to get stuck there.
Now, I am not condoning any emotional bypassing - but after you process the core wound and process everything else, you HAVE done the work. And now it is time to experience the fallout of old energies from your Quantum Field.
You don't have to feel like you will only be okay if you continue to process and process - that's a healing loop/trap! Let the wound heal, let it air out for a bit, don't overly pick at it or it will scar.
But the thing about grief is that it is still a fertile time to be abundant! Yes, I said it! Fuck the positive mindset movement that states that you cannot manifest or create when you are feeling grief.
Yes you can!
If anything, maintaining an open heart and be open to receive from God/Source when things feel shitty allows your feelings to be processed and it allows you to turn your pain into passionate work!
Find ways to show up and give back in some way - it will alleviate so much suffering in this cycle of separation!
Write...paint...dance...help others...laugh...play! That's what your inner child wants right now anyways - to play!
I always find new ways to channel my hurt into writing and helping others who may be experiencing the very thing I am experiencing right now (like I am doing right now!).
Yes, I am dealing with heavy ass purging right now! It fucking hurts some days! I have no clue what is going on in the physical! But I am learning so much and taking that wisdom and spinning it into gold for you all!
Let me experience empower you as well!
It can be easy to travel down Anxiety Lane, at the intersection of Overthinking Avenue and Sleepless Nights Street, but who wants to live in the heaviness of that energy?!
I get it, trust me! I love to think and process and ponder, but it can become a form of self-sabotage if we continue to get stuck there.
Now, I am not condoning any emotional bypassing - but after you process the core wound and process everything else, you HAVE done the work. And now it is time to experience the fallout of old energies from your Quantum Field.
You don't have to feel like you will only be okay if you continue to process and process - that's a healing loop/trap! Let the wound heal, let it air out for a bit, don't overly pick at it or it will scar.
But the thing about grief is that it is still a fertile time to be abundant! Yes, I said it! Fuck the positive mindset movement that states that you cannot manifest or create when you are feeling grief.
Yes you can!
If anything, maintaining an open heart and be open to receive from God/Source when things feel shitty allows your feelings to be processed and it allows you to turn your pain into passionate work!
Find ways to show up and give back in some way - it will alleviate so much suffering in this cycle of separation!
Write...paint...dance...help others...laugh...play! That's what your inner child wants right now anyways - to play!
I always find new ways to channel my hurt into writing and helping others who may be experiencing the very thing I am experiencing right now (like I am doing right now!).
Yes, I am dealing with heavy ass purging right now! It fucking hurts some days! I have no clue what is going on in the physical! But I am learning so much and taking that wisdom and spinning it into gold for you all!
Let me experience empower you as well!
Step Five, Final Thoughts and Words
If someone is making the choice to not hear you, to not see you, to not acknowledge your feelings, or to not talk to you - that's okay. That is their choice, and we cannot control the actions or choices of others.
But, you've got you...boo!
Someone's choice to not show up in a connection is not a reflection of you. This is a reflection of their wounds and their inner chaos to not feel fully empowered to show up right now. If anything, they are struggling with showing up for themselves and their inner child right now! This isn't a game of blame and it surely isn't a reason to hate someone. But maybe it's better off that things are the way they are right now.
When we show up to a situation or a connection with big, light-filled energy, it brings our shadows out. Like the 5 of Cups in the Rider-Waite Tarot depicts - when we are not facing love, we face our shadow, and our shadow shows us everything that has gone wrong in the past. (See card below for reference) As you can see, the character is grieving because of past woes even though the 2 cups (which represent love and partnership) stand upright behind him.
What I am trying to say is that the light from us or our partner can be blinding at times, so much so that we must turn to face the other direction (where our shadow happens to be - behind us). When we turn away from the light, we see the past and all that went wrong. Our shadow now casts across the love/our partner (the 2 cups) behind us.
When love feels like a shadow and all we can see is everything that's gone wrong - it can make it challenging to show up in a connection because, "What is the bad stuff from the past happens again?"
That is why it is important to stop trying to make them see what you see, stop trying to control what they see or feel, and let them be. Let yourself be as well!
Love yourself right now.
Give yourself what you need.
Honor and respect your boundaries and what you will/will not allow in.
Set up an agreement to be in a space of integrity with yourself.
Love and protect your inner child.
It is all moving forward even when it feels like you're sliding backward in time. Maybe you are sliding backward right now, only to rectify your power from the past? Maybe it feels like everything is falling apart because it is? Maybe the only thing falling apart is worn-out timelines and what no longer serves your soul?
Let go, Let God, and Love.
To work one-on-one in a sacred container with me, please visit www.taylorriner.com for more details on booking and services.
Big Love to You!
What I am trying to say is that the light from us or our partner can be blinding at times, so much so that we must turn to face the other direction (where our shadow happens to be - behind us). When we turn away from the light, we see the past and all that went wrong. Our shadow now casts across the love/our partner (the 2 cups) behind us.
When love feels like a shadow and all we can see is everything that's gone wrong - it can make it challenging to show up in a connection because, "What is the bad stuff from the past happens again?"
That is why it is important to stop trying to make them see what you see, stop trying to control what they see or feel, and let them be. Let yourself be as well!
Love yourself right now.
Give yourself what you need.
Honor and respect your boundaries and what you will/will not allow in.
Set up an agreement to be in a space of integrity with yourself.
Love and protect your inner child.
It is all moving forward even when it feels like you're sliding backward in time. Maybe you are sliding backward right now, only to rectify your power from the past? Maybe it feels like everything is falling apart because it is? Maybe the only thing falling apart is worn-out timelines and what no longer serves your soul?
Let go, Let God, and Love.
To work one-on-one in a sacred container with me, please visit www.taylorriner.com for more details on booking and services.
Big Love to You!
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